3 Lessons Learned From 8 Years Of Marriage

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Lessons Learned

Before we got hitched, Will and I were together for 9 years. Today, we celebrate 8 years of marriage. That’s 17 years of togetherness! Awww!

I’ve known Will for almost half of my life, and whilst our relationship isn’t perfect (whose is?!) – I haven’t wanted to kill him in his sleep (yet), and he’s incredibly tolerant of my ways. We’ve been together a long time now, and all things considered, I think we are doing great!

Looking back, we’ve learned one or two most valuable lessons…

1. Invest In Your Bed

Buy the BIGGEST bed you can afford, and get a luxury mattress.

When we bought our first home together, it was a ‘do’er-upper’ and we had so many expenses. To save money, we bought a regular double-sized bed with a standard mattress. Hubby is 6’2″ and I am 5’7″. We are not small people. It wasn’t good. Every time hubby moved, I felt it and vice versa. The mattress also had weak springs and formed a dip in the middle drawing us both towards the centre.

We now have a huuuge Super-King bed and we’ve invested in a memory foam mattress. I wish we did this right back at the beginning. I still get 2/3rd of the bed, but Will no longer has to cling to the edge for fear of falling out :)

I know, as newlyweds a small bed may seem all romantic, cosy and fun, but if you’re just starting out -put a bed on your wedding list. Ask for vouchers or a contribution towards a bed. Forget the fancy china and bathroom towels – invest in your sleep. You won’t regret it.

2. Be Different

Will and I are so very different in our personalities. It used to drive me crazy, but now I see how we totally complement each other. He is the yin to my yang.

If I’m mad, I tell him. I slam doors, I get angry. Will avoids conflict at all costs, keeps quiet and walks away. Yup, sometimes it makes me slightly madder (more mad?), but thank goodness as it’s probably saved divorce proceedings on several occasions.

I’m very impulsive. Will is far more restrained. I’m all, “Oooh, look! Let’s buy it!” Mr. Reserved reins me in and Googles the best deals. That man has saved this household THOUSANDS!

Will is outdoorsy, I’m not. However, since the Libran in me likes to keep balance and keep everyone happy, I’ve been persuaded to try out new adventures, like camping. Ha! Who’d have thought I’d love camping!

3. You’ve Gotta Laugh

Marriage is not easy. Growing old and raising a family is not easy. Having a special someone you can laugh with really helps. Whilst our sense of humour is very different (he likes Red Dwarf, I like Michael McIntyre) we often laugh together. When he is feeling down, I somehow know just the right silly thing to say that makes him laugh. Whether he’s laughing at me, or with me is still undecided :)

 

What about you? If you’ve been in a relationship for a while, do you have any lessons-learned that you can add to the list?

Let me know! Leave a comment in the box below! 

 

~ Natalie

 

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Comments

  1. says

    I totally agree with Laughing Together. Life is full of so many challenges, and easily most of our conversations could be about the issues we’re facing, which basically ‘ain’t no fun at all’…fo’ real! :)

    My tip would be to ‘Focus On The Good’.

    Big up the great things that are happening in our marriages, the great things about our husbands, and also the great things about us as wives. It’s gotta be intentional! It’s important to think about these things and also to SAY them out loud:)

  2. says

    You had me interested when you said invest in a good bed. We literally are suffering big time due to lack of a good bed!!

    My husband and I are polar opposites of each other. SO, I can definitely say it makes a world of difference.

    Thanks for sharing your words of wisdom with us. Congrats on making it 8 years.

  3. says

    OMG!!!
    Point 2… I will start to think about it… My hubby does the same, but probably there is a positive point in it…
    When he does it I get so mad! WOuld like to scream “cut his heeeeaaaadddd” as the bad queen in ALice in Wonderland… Thank you for sharing!

  4. Barry Lack says

    If you think you have a special relationship,ask yourself this question and be honest!
    “Could i live AND work with my partner 24/7 and still stay together?”
    My wife and i did for 46 years before she passed and i thank the powers that be for that IS special.

    Ps,
    Ask other couples that you know that question and see how many YES answers you get!!

  5. says

    Congratulations! It’s our 10th wedding anniversary next month and I agree with all your points, the large bed especially as my husband is such a hogger!

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